Yesterday was grandma's funeral. The night before, we found a bunch of pictures and taped them to a couple poster boards to display by her casket, which looked great! The girls all wore blue and one or two of grandma's necklaces (and in my case, one of her curtains haha!). We gathered 30 minutes before the funeral to look at grandma one last time and to say our goodbyes. The chapel it was held in was GORGEOUS, the stained glass was so pretty! It took me a few minutes to be able to go up and look at grandma laying there, and could only look for a couple seconds at once. That's only the second time I've ever seen a (human) dead body. *shivers* A few of grandma and Julie's friends came, a couple who I met a couple years ago when grandma lived in the other nursing home (we had lunch together). The reverend's service was nice..mom and I wrote him a little something in honor of grandma so we wouldn't have to go up and speak haha. Gina went up to speak (she arrived the day before, and is staying at the same hotel we are), and said things like "Jordan, grandma will be with you when you find another job. Joelle and Jessalyn, she'll be there at your wedding. Heather, she'll be there when you're choosing what book you want to read, and when you pick out new curtains!" OMG haha! Nicee. :P After the service, the funeral professionals (undertakers??) closed the casket and we walked behind them while they led the casket through the mausoleum to her last resting spot. I'd never been in a mausoleum before (that I know of), and always pictured them as dark, but it was the complete opposite! It was pretty nice. Grandma's spot is outside and overlooks the trees. They had to use a lift since the spot was at the top. I hope her spirit is happy there!
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Tomorrow, I fly back to Fairbanks. I'm always sad to leave family, but we'll make sure to still have reunions! It'll be great seeing Abby again, and going back to work lol. Hopefully the roads aren't still messed up from the storm. I'll post the rest of the pictures when I get back home, but here's the video of the "Do You Hear the People Sing?" karaoke!

Super fun! I love Julie's "microphone" haha

24. How Do You Celebrate Your Birthday? I go out to eat with my family and eat cake!

25. When Have You Failed? What Did You Learn From It? Many times..math tests in school for one. I had to study hard so I could barely pass LOL

26. What Activities Make You Feel Most Alive? Being in front of glaciers, being able to let loose like last night, etc

On Monday, mom and I got to Topeka. Amazingly, it was sunny in Seattle! Mt. Rainier looked epic, and the mist among the valleys looked so cool! My window was too iced up to take pictures though. Cindy picked us up..we were tired after flying all night and morning, but we went to grandma's right away (if we had sat down at Julie's, we wouldn't have wanted to get back up again!). It felt like a furnace when I got out of the car..I had forgotten what 100 degrees feels like!! D: Grandma was sitting up in bed watching the news (she likes Fox News..ugh), and was happy to see us! Her voice is very raspy, but she can talk, and she was eating and joking around with everyone. The previous day, she could barely speak and couldn't get her hand all the way to her mouth to eat, probably why Julie or Cindy called us. We were worried we wouldn't be able to see her in time, and there she was joking around with us! I imagined everyone sitting around her bed watching her last breaths, but nope! How does she DO that?! Seeing relatives helps I'm sure! Eventually we went back to Julie's and went to bed (since Aunt Gina is a night nurse anyway, she stays overnight with grandma)

We've spent a lot of time with grandma these past few days..she even got out of bed and sat in her chair! (Since she can't stand on her own, there's a lift thing with a net that "carries" her where she wants to go.) It's weird though..she can be totally lucid, take a nap and then just..barely be responsive and just stare into space. She won't tell you if she's hungry or thirsty or anything, you have to ask her, and even then may not respond for a minute. I worry we're annoying her, because we're constantly fussing over her (she needs help with everything, like cutting up her food). I keep wondering if she's having mini-strokes. Today when we got there she was happy, ate some food, took a nap, then did her "vacant stare" when she woke up. It's frustrating and really hard to see..we're spending all this time with her and she barely notices. :( I get "cabin fevery" sitting there for hours (I bring my laptop and food and stuff, but it's not quite the same as doing those things at home. Today we were watching hours of memorable performances from America's Got Talent, which was fun, but the TV is SO loud because grandma is somewhat hard of hearing and I was just..going stir crazy. I know we came for grandma, but I'd like to other things too, even just to get a bite to eat or something. I mentioned Olive Garden and mom was like "no, we came for grandma!" and I groaned and put my head in my hands, starting to panic. Cindy could tell I was getting overstimulated and asked if I wanted to leave, which I said yes to, so mom went to the bathroom before we left, and in that time just started crying..ugh, so embarrassing! Mom hugged me and I apologized (I KNOW it's part of autism to involuntarily melt down when overstimulated, but I still feel guilty). She said it was ok and to just tell her "limit" next time, and she'll understand when I need to leave. The silence of Julie's house was very nice after that! Mom said we can go to Olive Garden tomorrow, and anyone else who wants to join us (I wish we could all go, but someone has to stay with grandma). It was pretty hot today too, in the 90s (ugh), but it's supposed to "cool" down into the 80s this weekend. Uncle Dean arrived with Blanca tonight too, after that SUPER exciting drive from Santa Fe LOL (the forgotten corner of Oklahoma is especially exciting O_o). He brought games, so that should help with being less bored too lol

If grandma stays the way she is, mom and Ryan and I will fly back to Fairbanks on Sunday..she has an appointment on Tuesday I think, and I should go back to work (next time I say my grandma is going to die, no one will believe me! It'll be like the boy who cried wolf D:). I'm not sure how long everyone else is staying, but mom had already planned to come to Kansas in September, so she won't be gone too long. I just hope grandma doesn't get bad again after we leave. I hope we can catch grandma in lucid moments again, but we never know what she'll be like, even from hour to hour. I'm glad she's not alone though. Guess we'll see what she's like tomorrow lol

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26. Do You Write in Cursive? Only when signing my name, which is more like a squiggly line than anything legible LOL

27. What Are Your Earliest Memories of Music? Dancing to music in the living room when little

28. What Would You Grab in a Fire? Abby, my backpack, pictures, etc

29. Do You Have Any Tattoos? If Not, Would You Ever Consider Getting a Tattoo? Yes, I have four

Before Ryan and mom and I left yesterday, we took this picture (too bad we hadn't thought to do it when we were with grandma!)

In the back is Aunt Julie, her husband Kerry (my step-uncle?) and Ryan, in front is Aunt Gina, mom, me and cousin Joelle. A great picture, even Ryan's smiling! One thing I hate about Julie's house is that the previous person was a heavy smoker (she can't get rid of the smell no matter how much she cleans..whatever she cleans drips orange. EW D:), and when I get home all my clothes reek of smoke. It can't be healthy breathing that in! D:

On the first flight, as we were descending into Seattle, a bolt of lightning hit the plane right outside my window!! (There was a popping sound too.) I'm sure planes get hit by lightning all the time, but I'd never seen it happen before. Alarming, but cool to see too lol (I also watched Joker..wow, that role must have been hard on Joaquin Phoenix D:). On the second flight I had an isle seat, but when I glanced at the window I saw some snowy scenery..I hope the person sitting at the window saw some glaciers lol. Abby was SUPER happy to see me when I got home, awww. <3 Hopefully there's not a crazy amount of things to do at work tomorrow haha (thankfully, mom isn't super sick, but she still feels "on the edge" of being sick. Glad it didn't get worse!)

( pokemon update )

18. How Well Do You Perform Under Pressure? Not the greatest, especially if people are watching..I get fumbly and awkward haha. Too stressful!

19. What Do You Want Your Obituary to Say? I really don't like these kind of questions.. D:

On Monday after midnight, mom and I started the journey to Kansas..ugh, redeyes are exhausting haha. On the second flight, when I started watching Thor: Love and Thunder, I 100% did NOT expect to hear "Only Time" by Enya! I LOVE that song, so I was pleased and surprised haha. We got a rental car after we landed, got food at Sonic so we could stay awake, then drove to Julie's house. Unfortunately, Aunt Cindy's dog Blanca has been very sick (she threw up blood D:), and since grandma's been doing well, she's not going to come until Blanca is stable. I'm sad I don't get to see her, but I'd do the same if Abby was sick. We briefly stopped at Julie's house and then went to see grandma (we were exhausted, but we couldn't get comfortable or we wouldn't want to get up again!). When we got to her room, Julie, Joelle and Gina were already there..everyone was happy to see us! Grandma taking my hands and thanking me for coming was definitely worth the exhaustion! We think she got sepsis from picking at her skin (she has some kind of skin condition, and she is convinced there are worms in her skin for some reason O_o), and even though she literally almost DIED, she was still picking at her skin, which frustrated everybody. I understand somewhat because I've been picking at my skin for 30+ years..it's HARD to stop, but I think I'd be cured if I almost died O_o

Aunt Gina is very into metaphysics/Reiki/paranormal things, so she was talking to us about chakras and auras and stuff like that. She was surprised I couldn't see people's auras/energy, but I can definitely feel them! It just..soaks into my skin when people are upset or angry. I asked her if animals could feel them, because animals like dogs who don't normally go to strangers come to both mom and I, and she said yes. Interesting. She also has these tuning fork things that are supposed to be healing or something, and my face twitched when she put the fork next to my face haha. We stayed until visiting hours were over, then went back to Julie's house, where we were finally able to go to bed. I had to take Clonazepam because traveling is overstimulating, but after that, I didn't wake up until 10:30!

I definitely felt pretty wrecked when I woke up yesterday..traveling from Alaska is exhausting! Ryan arrived yesterday, and everyone was definitely happy to see him when we went to the hospital. Gina did the tuning fork thing on Ryan, and he said it gave him images of Sedona. Grandma was able to eat more, which was a good sign. We again stayed until visiting hours were over, then went back home. I went to sleep kinda quickly, woke up once during the night, and slept until 9 something! If only I slept like that at my apartment haha

This morning Gina was showing me and Ryan these paranormal apps, where it picks up spirits talking to you (one was Necrometer). I wasn't sure if those were even real, but Ryan was making a parfait, and one voice said "parfait?" O_o I about died when I heard "we are here!" OMG. Gina told the spirits our names, and the spirit came back with his name. That was..quite interesting. *shivers* Gina went to see grandma and mom took a shower, and when we got on the road, we got a text saying she was going to be discharged to a medical rehab type place! Considering how sick she was, that is so awesome! We visited for a few minutes at the hospital, and left when they were preparing to move her to the other place. Mom and Ryan and I went to Wal-Mart to get groceries, dropped them off at Julie's, then went to the assisted living place to get some of grandma's things. That assisted living place isn't as fancy as the previous one, but it's still pretty nice (I was excited to see the curtains LOL). Grandma loves the food there too. While there, I left notes all around her apartment, like "welcome home! You are strong!" under her pillow, "it's cold in here!" in her fridge, "walk like an Egyptian" on her walker, etc. She's going to love that when she gets back home hehe. When we checked in at the rehab place, I was surprised there weren't any curtains at the entrance lol. Grandma's bed looked way more comfortable than the hospital bed! She looked great too. After dropping off her stuff and walking back to the entrance, I suddenly saw a whole bunch of curtains there! How did I miss them before?! Weird haha. After that we went to Olive Garden (breadsticks and five cheese ziti...*drools*) and then went back to Julie's. It's nice to relax now!

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13. How Careful Are You Online? I try to be careful, sometimes I probably slip up though..

14. Have You Ever Reinvented Yourself? Sure, especially when I first got into metal music and when I moved to Alaska

15. Which Is More Important: Talent or Hard Work? Both, they go together lol

Today we took grandma to the Ted Ensley Gardens..every April is Tulip Time, when volunteers plant thousands of tulips. They were really pretty! There were cool trees too, like Eastern Red Cedars, Japanese maples, redbuds, etc. Mom and I found a geocache there too! It was a nice outing for grandma :)

Here are pics!

Mom, me, Cindy, grandma, Julie, Joelle

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22 – Earth Day: This is the 53rd Earth Day. What one thing do you think every citizen of Earth should pledge to do to save our planet? Not litter

23 – World Book Night: World Book Night aims to change the way adults view reading by encouraging them to take the time to read during the night, when they have more time. Do you do most of your reading during the day or at night? Do you wish you had more time to read during the day? What are the main pros and cons of doing most of your reading at night? I usually read the most during the night, but I will during the day if I'm traveling or something. Sometimes. Pros: cozy and helps relax me before bed. Cons: I might read later than I should lol

1. When have you recently had to correct one of your errors? Probably recently, I might have said a wrong thing or something..
2. When did you last break something you wish you hadn’t? Not sure..
3. When have you taken a wrong turn (literally or figuratively) and found yourself in a better place? When I lived in Texas I read Texas by James Michener, which talked about a church in Waxahachie (30 miles from Dallas). Well my friend and I went to a Renaissance festival near Waxahachie, and when we left, Caitlin made a wrong turn, which lead us right into the city, where I saw that very church! I was so excited haha
4. When did you most recently return a purchase to the seller? Maybe at the beginning of this year, when I wanted to get a new mattress for my new bed, but kept finding uncomfortable ones lol..good thing Costco takes things back no matter what :P
5. From whom do you most willingly take correction? Mom, Denise, etc

Mom and I got to Topeka on Tuesday after a looong day of flying all night and a lot of the day..it was nice to see Aunt Julie, and then go to bed, because we were exhausted. :P It was nice seeing grandma the next day..we asked if she wanted to go to dinner and she was like "YESSS" haha..she loves eating out too. :P We went to Olive Garden..yumm. Yesterday we went to lunch and Target, where we found some clothes. Today my cousin Joelle flew in from Texas (nice seeing her too!) to get some tests done to see if she has POTS, which were positive. She seems positive and optimistic about it though. I think tomorrow grandma is coming to Julie's for dinner. Mom and I brought winter with us, because it is FREEZING outside (in the 30s, and of course it's always windy)..darn :P (random, but I love the fancy curtains where grandma lives LOL)

( nov 8-11 )

On Wednesday, I woke up to a clear blue day! My Weather Wizardry strikes again. :P I saw Denali in the distance (when you fly direct to Seattle, you skirt around the Alaska Range) and the mountains just looked so nice. <3 I did see some pretty cool glaciers too! On the flights I watched Underwater and Mary Queen of Scots (I was four-poster bed hunting LOL). It was 11 something I think when I landed at Kansas City, and mom and Aunt Cindy picked us up..it usually only takes like an hour to get to Topeka, but it took longer because it was pretty foggy. Even though it was like 1 AM when I got to the house, I took a shower anyway, because flying is gross :P

Thursday I saw Julie and Dean, and their pets..Julie has two cats (Yoda and Beano) and two dogs (Teddy and Lucy). Cindy and Dean have a dog named Blanca (I met her before though). Lots of animals to pet!! Haha. Yoda is a beautiful tuxedo cat..it took her a few moments to warm up to me, which surprised Julie because it usually takes her longer (for mom it took like a day or two). Beano was much more skittish, so I was very surprised when later that night he jumped up onto the couch and demanded me to pet her haha, and was kneading a blanket next to me. Cats know I love them LOL. I visited grandma at the assisted care facility she lives at, which is a really nice place! Her room is spacious (she has a little four-poster bed, though without the top part..I joked that we should get her tiny curtains LOL) and the people who work there are really nice. Grandma said she's very happy being in the US again lol, and was happy to see me too. I think this was the day we went to Olive Garden, yummm

Yesterday we visited grandma again, but didn't do much else that was exciting. It was pretty windy though. Today we went downtown and went to a bookstore and a couple thrift shops (I got a cool lamp with ships on the lampshade!). Mom and I found a geocache, and almost got blown away by the wind!! It literally pushed you around if you weren't standing firmly! We went to Chipotle for lunch, then got supplies and food and stuff for grandma's party (her birthday is tomorrow, but Julie has to go to Colorado tomorrow, so we did the party today) and decorated a room at the care home. Aunt Gina drove up from Wichita, and then it was time to party! We had sandwiches, cupcakes, mimosas, and a LOT of laughter haha. There was also a thunderstorm that came by! It was fun, but tiring. It was great seeing grandma having so much fun though :D

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20. What do a lot of people have very strong opinions about, even though they know very little about it? Politics?

21. Who in your life is the worst at using technology? Dad, grandma, etc

22. What was the biggest realization you had about yourself? Learning I was asexual, for one

23. What memory of yours feels real but is most likely false? I've wondered if my memory of me swinging and one of my parents telling me to comb my hair and me saying "no!" was actually a dream..

On Saturday we went to the Monet exhibit at the Denver Art Museum..mom still wasn't feeling the greatest, but she went anyway. Denver (downtown at least) was not what I was expecting..there were so many homeless people! It was really sad to see that. Monet's paintings are nice, but there were so many of them..they gave you a device you could listen to as you went along, but I thought it was boring, and I really didn't want to spend five minutes looking at one painting. But we got through it, though sadly Gina had to drive back to Kansas after that for work. The rest of us went to this bookstore that also had records, an arcade, a cafe, etc. It was interesting, but hard to look at books because the lighting was terrible in certain places, random equipment was set in front of some shelves, and books were just piled on the floor..I still found some cool books though. Joelle, who is 16, insisted we go to a sex shop, which was interesting LOL. We also went to Voodoo Donuts..I'd heard about them, but I didn't think they were THAT good lol. Jessalyn was craving Korean food, and insisted we go to one when we got back to Loveland (an hour away). I didn't really NEED to eat more food, but went anyway LOL. Jessalyn was very pleased about cooking her meal and satisfying her craving haha. Then we went back to the house..the wind was HOWLING, it was crazy! Cindy called Gina to check on her, and Gina said she saw a meteor fall from the sky and land on the ground, and when she passed the spot where it landed she saw embers on the ground! How awesome is that?? I bet not a lot of people can say that! Then we packed and went to bed (and listened to the crazy howling wind)

Yesterday we all had to leave. *sniff* Mom and I had to get up SUPER early, around 6:15, to drive back to Denver..ugh. Mom thought she had a fever, and I was feeling "throaty" too..probably from flying with a bunch of sick people. Plus I just feel awful getting up that early anyway..bleh. Only Julie and Kerry were awake to say bye too, but we didn't want to wake the others up or get them sick..I think they understood, but I felt guilty anyway. :P The sunrise looked so weird over the flat landscape (the mountains were on the opposite side, and were really pretty!). We grabbed two geocaches on the way to the airport (easy when they're RIGHT THERE at the gas station :P). We only had two flights this time, and no long layovers, which was good, because we just wanted to get home lol. I watched the rest of Into the Storm (and had tornado nightmares last night :P), the new Lion King (stick with the original) and most of Ad Astra. I was on the wrong side for the best glacier view, but I did see one, its moraines covered with snow, so yay. :P The top of Mt. Deborah looked really pretty poking out of the clouds in the sunset. It was -35 in Fairbanks, oh YAY LOL. Mom and I were so happy to get home though, and the cats were happy to see us too. <3 I almost made it to 9, but just had to go to bed..I think I slept for 11 hours! It was definitely needed though. I hope the others can visit us, but I don't think I quite convinced them yet :P

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4. What one thing are you looking forward to in 2020? I don't really have anything else planned right now, but hopefully traveling somewhere cool?

5. What’s your favorite way to spend a Sunday morning? Reading, going online and eating breakfast (mom and I usually have pancakes lol)

6. Tell about an “Aha!” moment you’ve had. Paulette teaching me how to count back change, when it didn't make sense to me before

Tomorrow mom and Ryan and I are flying to Arizona for our vacation! (The flight leaves at 7 something AM, so we have to get up early..ughhh. D:) While we're there we'll also go to Santa Fe to visit Aunt Cindy and Uncle Dean..Aunt Julie and Gina are going to meet us there too! I saw Cindy and Dean a couple years ago, but I haven't seen the other two (and Julie's children) in years! It'll be cool to see them again. I'll also see Dana again, since we'll be there at the same time! I so love that we can see each other in person more often than once every few years lol (how did dad manage to buy a house in the same town her husband's parents live in?! We'll never get over that lol). One of my favorite things about going to Payson is looking at old pics I haven't seen in years (it's weird though..my life is so completely different now that it feels like my Texas life happened to another person, in another lifetime haha). Dad said there's lots to look through, yay! We have Internet at the house now (we can turn it off when we leave and pay like $10 a month, so that's nice). Looking forward to nice weather and more sunlight too lol. It shall be fun :D

Today's trivia: Yakutsk, Russia, is the biggest city built on continuous permafrost. Its population is almost 300,000 and its average winter temperature is (−30 °F), which makes Yakutsk the coldest city of its size or greater in the world

Tomorrow I am going to Oklahoma City! Mom has a class for work there. We may come back to Texas on the weekend though..if not I think Aunt Julie and her kids are gonna visit us at the hotel! Hopefully the hotel has internet access so I can go online when mom's at her class. Or I could go to places around the hotel if there's anything good..


:D

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Dog team: A gang of dogs harnessed to a sled. Dog teams were used for winter transportation, freight and mail hauling, until they were replaced by trains, planes and snowmobiles. They are enjoying a renaissance brought on by the newly lucrative sport of sled-dog racing. From front to back, a team is composed of a leader, point dogs, swing dogs, and wheel dogs